Often times on this journey called life we are completing our
day to day tasks, going from here to there, working, brunching and lunching,
dancing and skipping and then we are faced with a moment that we have no
control over. We cannot press the pause button and we do not have the ability
to ask for an instant restart. It feels like the bottom simply fell out.
Yesterday evening, I was faced with a question that took me back to a
place I thought He had already delivered me. The question came from a fertility
friend that said, “I feel like the bottom
has fallen out. How do I keep moving?” This question was a throat punch and blow to
my stomach. It took me back to the place where I felt like Alice in Wonderland
falling down a rabbit hole not knowing when I was going to hit the bottom. Was
there a net, a friend, my husband or someone there that would catch me? There
was no choir singing, “I won’t let you
fall if you lean on Me.” It was
simply what seemed like a never-ending fall and nothing to grab and hold for
safety nor security.
On this road to fertility or the road to the blessing you
desire, we have to realize at that very moment when we feel the bottom is
falling out that this is the TEST! This is the point where God wants to see if
we will trust Him with the thing that we desire most. Will we be faithful to
Him when we get it? What is that He is building in us through the process?
The worst thing about the bottom falling out is everyone
believing you have it all together yet you are hurting and in despair. Everyone is looking up to you
but no one is ever seeing you nor your pain. What happens when you are a
successful person but you are going to doctor appointment after doctor
appointment getting NO after NO and people have expectations for you to simply
be you? No one is aware that you need them to be there for you. No one knows
the pain you are feeling. You are at the bottom and it is lonely.
So what happens when the bottom falls out? What happens when
you feel this faith walk is more like falling in a rabbit’s hole with no end in
sight? You simply pause and reflect on the promises of God. You realize that
this is all for your good. You pray that God removes the scales from your eyes so you are able to know that where I am now is not my final destination! You ask Him to remove the shackles from your mind and your imagination so you are able to realize God can trust you! He placed you on
this journey because He knows you will give him Glory after this.
